Whew! This morning's effort at "snow" removal was like using a shovel to empty a swimming pool. I feel like my aged cat, who used to entertain himself by jumping from the floor to the top of the refrigerator but who I now lift onto the bathroom vanity so that he can drink from the running faucet while I brush my teeth.
With steady application, however, I can still help my 7th-grader work through to the solution of a vexing math problem. Word problems in particular cause her to throw her arms in the air and yell, with her expressive face, because I would frown if she used her larynx, "WTF!?"
A man receives income from two investments at simple interest rates of 6½% and 8%, respectively. He has twice as much invested at 6½% as at 8%. If his annual interest from the two investments is $698.25, find how much is invested at each rate.
First, since this is the Minneapolis Public Schools, I think the problem should commence, "A person of unspecified gender mired in end-stage capitalism . . ."—but let's accept it on its own unwoke terms. "Calm down," I say to her, since in my experience that works with women of all ages, "and give thanks that it's simple interest. You just need to change the words into equations."
Look of expressive despair converted to blank disdain, but, with coaxing, she writes down, after a couple false starts:
0.065x + 0.08y = 698.25
And what else do you know? "There's twice as much at 6½%," she says. A little light in her eyes now. That look must be why some people stay in education despite the low pay. She writes down
x = 2y
and now knows just what to do:
0.065(2y) + 0.08y = 698.25
0.13y + 0.08y = 698.25
0.21y = 698.25
y = 698.25 ÷ 0.21 = 3325
She's really happy when she punches the last button on her calculator and sees the nice round figure, "3325." That's when you know you're right. If it was fractions of a cent, or even of a dollar, back to the drawing board. But this is math class, not real life, and I remember that moment of tension followed immediately by either despair [3325.4148629713] or satisfaction [3325]. Homework help almost makes me feel young again. I remind her that she needs to say how much is invested at each rate.
y = 3325 and x = 2y so x = 3325 x 2 = 6650⇒the dude had $6650 at 6½% and $3325 at 8%.
I make a joke about how "the dude" needs a different financial advisor, but she saved the hardest problem for last and is already on her phone, calling her bff, whom she never sees anymore except on Facetime—for the same reason that school is in her bedroom. I had a little fun with the details of the problem but am impressed that school kids in Minneapolis are learning this stuff in 7th grade. I mean, I'd be surprised if the people Hollywood stars and hedge fund managers hire to take college entrance exams for their kids couldn't do problems like this, but presumably they're not 7th graders. At this rate, she's on her own within a year or two.
Funniest thing I read today: Women on a dating app switch their political filter to "conservative" in order to find men who offer to send them pics of themselves inside the Capitol on January 6. The women then forward the pics along with their correspondent's dating profile to the FBI. I wonder if the FBI is embarrassed not to have thought to do this itself. More women should work in law enforcement. For some reason, they seem to have a better handle on how stupid these losers are apt to be.
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