Some pretty large part of the sensations Trump's legal troubles stir within me arise, I've come to believe, from my immature notion that corruption at the highest levels, while expected, should possess a certain elevation, dignity, and sophistication, as befits the lofty positions of the criminal plotters. But it's never like that, apparently. Just before I was old enough to vote:
Setting: Oval Office
Minions: These guys could squawk.
POTUS: It wouldn't be hard to raise a ton of hush money, pay them off.
Minions: OK, sure, yeah, we can do that.
And now, a week into my life as a Medicare beneficiary, I still feel a slight twinge when, on the morning after a former president is indicted in Georgia for trying to steal 16 electoral votes, he announces:
It's just embarrassingly shoddy and threadbare. When you zoom in, you notice the 8th-grade, C-level language errors: for example, if the report is complex (or Complex) and detailed (or Detailed), that would obviously make it harder to refute (more Irrefutable), and the conjunction therefore should be "and," not "but." Of course it's worse when you are zoomed out. I guess we're supposed to believe that, nearly three years now after the election, and on the morning after the indictment comes down, he's putting the final touches on the magnum opus proving that he won Georgia. What a coincidence! If the Irrefutable EVIDENCE had taken a week—or 30 months—less to develop, things would be different. Though inevitably, two days later:
He's sometimes been called a "con man," but if you're this bad at it, do you even deserve the title? The stream flows continuously. "I have people in Hawaii investigating whether Obama was really born there, and let me tell you, the stuff they're finding is amazing." I think it's been more than a couple of weeks since the details of his health plan replacing Obamacare were to be announced in "probably about two weeks." Et cetera.
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